Thursday, April 12, 2007

Ranting and Raving

Only read this post if you have the time. PLEASE.

BLACK MEN

Please click this link and watch this ENTIRE video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJbDvAMORr8
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What the hell happened to our men?

My ex's (don't ack like y'all 'ont know who I'm talkin' bout, JR's trifflin/sexy ass) MAMA was in this video. This shit is hot out here in L.A.

Now, not everybody out here is a gangster obviously, but there are a LOT of them out here. And even more who WANNA be gangsters. What the hell? And if you're not a gangster, or you don't want to be one, you wanna be one of these.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7iZvvcNBTE

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When did Black people stop reading? 'Cause I'm pretty sure this nigga ain't picked up nan book.

I'm so fucking sick of my young, Black men acting out like this. Everything is about being a pimp or a gangster. Everything that's attractive, entertaining, or nice is either "gangsta" or "pimp".

I once asked a guy I liked what he did for a living or if he went to school, and his response was, "Why you askin' me all lat? I mean who all up in my business. It ain't like we gone get married or nuthin'!"

What?! Damn nigga, why you just can't say you ain't got no damn job?!

But for those them do "tell" you what they do for a living, here's what they often say (I've comprised a list for you):

1."I'm a money maka."
2."I'm a go getta(damn you Jezzy)."
3. "I make it do what it do."
4."I be on nuh 'grind'. "
5."I'm make music."
6. "I just do me."
How is 'doin' you and gadamn occupation?
and my very favourite, please note, this response can be given to either question 'What do you do for a living, or, 'How was your day?'
7. "Well, I can't really be sayin' all lat on da phone, knaemean?"

Good Jesus.

I'm so mad a Black men right now it's sickening.

WHITE MEN

Why when I was at the copier yesterday, did this white man call me Kim, and when I turned around, he said" Oh, I'm sorry, wrong person".

HOLD UP. PAUSE!

Lemme tell y'all about what "Kim" looks like:

*4"11
*100lbs
*mocha frapaccino colored skin
*short natural hair
*size 14 A bra
*only wears slacks
*wears business suits everyday, she she is in HR

Now, lemme tell y'all what La Negra Linda looks like:
*5"4(5"8 in heels, which I wear EVERYDAY)
*125lbs
*milk chocolate skin
*long basket weave
*wears skirts everyday
*dresses very casually

1.How the fuck could you get us confused? If Kim wore the shoes I wear, she wouldn't be my height.2. Did the muthafucka think she grew 14 inches of hair since the last time he saw her?

Oh did I fail to mention he had just left a meeting with this hoe FIVE FUCKING MINUTES before he saw me?! I saw they asses in the conference room!

I had on a BROWN PLAID SKIRT!

She had on a BLACK SUIT!

WHAT IN THE MUSTY COITUS HELL?

Sorry y'all. I just had to get this shit outta my system. I'll be back tomorrow with a few funny posts. I'm off to pick Carl up from work?

Huh? Who's Carl? Oh. Yeah, remember lil' dick? Yeah, that's him. He thinks I'm his woman now. Meh.

Turns out his penis isn't so little. It's just when you have sex with a mule,(JR) and then go back to humans,, it just seems smaller.

I'll be back tomorrow y'all.

Holler.

3 comments:

Jess said...

dont tell me youre fuckin his ass again i will fuck you up

goldiilocs said...

omg, let me tell you a story. why one time, right? i was working at this rec center in high school (i was living in oregon, long story) and there was this other black girl who was short, brown skinned, and had a short permed flip do. okay, i was 5'7ish, natural hair, and bright as hell....why the white lady look at my hand and call me by her name? i'm like....i don't look like her! at all! wtf? i'm like a giant compared to her. they was lunchin'.

Julia_Claudine_Deveraux said...

Girl I stopped breathing after "musty coitus hell"! Where in the world did you come up with that shit?!!?!? LMBAO!